BSDEV2: The BS Detector

Scientists at the prestigious Mediterranean Technological School of Science (MTSS) have invented the world's first consumer use Bullshit Radar, named BSDEV2.  The pocket sized device translates your conversations with other people and determines the level of erroneous or self-serving information on their part.  The development of the device went has been subject to much criticism for the ethical questions raised and the potential health risks it may pose to the recipient of the device as well as the radiation exposure that it emits to the owner who has to carry it around all the time.


Upon detection a small transmitter encased in the device ejects through a hatch and then sends a 40 volt shock along with trace amounts of scopolamine and Aves pheromones mixture through the person who is full of shit.  This leaves them incapacitated.  Voice commands are then prompted to encourage the owner to repeatedly punch and kick the malefactor, until the machine hears the person weep.  The user can set the voice command in a male or female voice and is offered in 30 different languages.  Other features of the device include a digital music player, GPS and stretch mark laser removal.


The developers of this technology feel that it will serve a benefit to consumers all over the world.


Lead scientist, Ogar Hemedous explains,


“One would consider the obvious applications for this tool in law enforcement, however we think the everyday consumer will benefit from this, more than the police.  We see these being used by everyday people in banks, car dealerships, cable subscriptions negotiations, or any random solicitation in the marketplace.  We are even looking at future software upgrades to detect BS with telemarketers.  The device would detect error of conduct over the phone and send a deafening pulse through the receiving, causing temporary, yet maddening tennitus.”


The small appliance is expected to reach the marketplace in a couple of years.  It is currently in beta tests with a few major militaries and a consumer version should hit store shelves the Christmas after next.


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